The Stress of Motherhood

My son is a little delayed in his speech. A Speech Therapist comes to see him twice a month to help him communicate better.

He has made significant progress, but there are areas that can use improvement.

Clear communication is key to any relationship and when communication is lacking, it can create a very stressful environment.

Case in point:

Earlier this week, I had to get a TB skin test in order to become an “official” volunteer for the Cancer Center.

I had to take my son with me.

When I entered the parking deck for the hospital, I saw a park in the compact car section by the exit. I was driving the Mommywagon, but I parked there anyway. I was nervous the last time I parked in this parking deck because there were cars going around blind corners at speeds faster than they should be. I decided to chance a ticket versus an accident.

I put my son in the stroller, made sure I had a few toys and snacks for him, and started the journey inside the building. We hopped on the elevator and went up to the floor of the clinic. My son started to cry as soon as I opened the door to the clinic.

“Oh boy…here we go,” I thought to myself. I signed in and pushed him over to the seating area. He whined and gave me this face like he was trying to tell me something, but I had no clue what he was trying to say.

I gave him his toy steamroller that makes sounds, but he didn’t want it. I took the toy and pushed it along the table next to me making truck noises.

That didn’t calm him.

I gave him some juice and that barely kept him quiet. I figured that he probably wanted to get out of his stroller and I wasn’t about to let that happen.

Then, my son started reaching for my purse and digging in it, as if he were looking for something. “Nothing’s in there for you,” I tell him as I start to get irritated.

Finally, I was called back so that I could get my shot. The whole process took less than 5 minutes.

I left the office, got in the elevator with my son and saw a lady that looked like she was in her 40s. She was very friendly, despite my son whining. She said to me, “Don’t feel bad. I’ve been there.” Her words were like medicine to me.

I looked at her and said, “It’s very stressful sometimes.” The wise lady told me that with every age comes a new challenge. She had a teenager and though he was relatively independent, there were new issues to deal with.

We said goodbye to each other when the elevator opened and I headed back to the car, praying that I didn’t have a ticket for parking a Mommywagon in the compact car section.

God must have had mercy on me due to my stress, because there was no ticket on my car.

I pulled my son out of the stroller and told him to get in his carseat. I proceeded to the back of the car to put his stroller up.

My son watched me put the stroller up and refused to sit in his seat.

I said to him, “Get in your seat baby,” with a level of frustration.

I put the stroller in the trunk and went over to him, where he was standing up beside his carseat.

All of a sudden, I smelled something.

My son had pooped!

I thought that we were done with poops for the day when he took one this morning before we left. I guess I was wrong!

He had diarrhea type poop, so I know that didn’t feel good to sit on. My guess was that he did it right before we went in the office, which would explain why he was so whiny, why he was looking in my purse, and why he was squirming so much. His stomach was probably hurting a little bit too.

I’ve been working with my son for months, trying to get him to say words like “potty, boo-boo, pee-pee.”

However, as you can see, it has been unsuccessful.

If he would have just said one of the three magic words, I wouldn’t be writing this post today.

I have to constantly guess and pray for discernment on whether he is whining because something is wrong, or whining because he can’t get his way.

It can be mentally exhausting!

What if I would have spanked him for creating a scene in the office? He was just trying to tell me that he had pooped. It would have been wrong for me to punish him for his attempt to communicate, no matter how annoying it was.

All of these thoughts overwhelmed me as I changed his diaper in the backseat. I got him cleaned up and I told him to get in his seat, to which he did happily. I went to the front of the car to get a bag for his poopy diaper, got in the driver’s seat, cranked up the car, and went home.

No mom is perfect, despite her own expectations or the expectation of others. Moms need to support and pray for each other.

Experienced moms need to give words of advice and encouragement to younger moms. The woman in the elevator really lifted my spirits. If she would have acted mean or tried to tell me what I should and/or should not do as some people do when you have a crying child, it would have just made the situation worse.

Here is my request for all of you this week.

1. If you see an overwhelmed mom with a crying child, give her a word of encouragment. It’s the Christ-like thing to do. Don’t pass judgment on her or the child. You never know what their situation is.

2. Pray for me that I will be able to discern what’s going on with my child, despite any speech issues and communication breakdowns.

3. Pray that my son will soon start to use his words for the sanity of my entire household! J

Have a blessed and stress free day!

Tagged as: Mommyhood, speech issues, stress