Hello Bloggy Friends!
I had no clue that I would create such a firestorm of passion and emotion by writing the blog post, The Real Housewives…Really?
Your comments were great and I feel the same way. I would say that we are all in agreement that a housewife is a married woman that is a helpmeet to her husband and that these reality shows aren’t a proper depiction into the REAL lives of most housewives.
One person commented that she didn’t like the term “Housewife”. To be perfectly honest, I don’t care much for the term either.
I guess at the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter though. You say po-tay-to, I say po-tah-to.
I remember the first time someone called me a housewife. I was at a doctor’s appointment and the front dest clerk asked me where I worked. I told them I was a stay-at-home mom and she said, “Oh, a housewife.” I immediately felt myself get annoyed, but I had to suppress the emotion behind it.
I think I have such negative feelings about the term “housewife” because society places such a low value on it.
Even dictionary.com acknowledges the word housewife as being offensive. Here is what it said:
“Housewife is offensive to some, perhaps because of an implied contrast with career woman (just a housewife) and perhaps because it defines an occupation in terms of a woman’s relation to a man. Homemaker is a common substitute.”
Questions:
Do you think the word “Housewife” is offensive?
Do you prefer another term? Or does it not matter to you?
Do you think society recognizes the importance and value of housewives?
{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }
I don't mind the term housewife.
It's only offensive because we, housewives; stay-at-home-moms; keepers of the home, have fallen into believing, weather we want to admit it or not, that there is not worth in the blessing of working inside our home.
In spite of what those who have no clue of what we really do think, there is worth at being a housewife; stay-at-home-mom; keeper of the home.
I've got some stuff on my mind to write about this subject as well that I've been putting off until I can deliver it in a gently way…;)
smooches,
Larie
Oh, I like the blue background!
smooches,
Larie
@Larie – can't wait to see what you write. I'll be honest and say that I had no clue what stay-at-home moms did until I became one. Maybe we need an awareness campaign or appreciation day like everything else.
I kind of hate the term.
It feels oppressive to me and like something whose time has been and is gone.
I wish we could find a way to describe a woman who pours love into her children, husband & home, puts aside her own ambitions for a time and continually sacrifices her needs to prepare her babies to become noble people of God and barbarians for Jesus.
Housewife?
Nope, doesn't quite cut it.
I hope I don't offend anyone by saying this but sometimes we overthink situations. I too have been guilty of quickly correcting someone when they call edme a housewife by saying "You mean executive housewife". The term housewife has been around for ages and it was simply a term used to describe a woman who chose to stay home and take care of her family. Sometimes we update terms to boast our own egos. I admit I prefer a fancier term b/c it rids the void of feeling like all I do is cook, clean and do laundry. Being a housewife is a blessing. These days it takes two incomes to make ends meat. If you are a housewife, then I would encourage you to be proud. It means that you are in a place to give your family your total attention without the interference of an outside job. There are a lot of women who would give anything to be in a housewife's apron:)
B
I don't mind the term. I know my worth in and out my home. I chose to be a stay-at-home mom and I agree there should be more awareness on exactly what a housewife does in her daily routine.
I guess I'm the confused one – I work and still consider myself a housewife! LOL.
It's not offensive to me at all. We were called 'helpmeet' from the beginning. I believe it's an honor to be able to stay home with your children and provide a home that your husband is proud of…
Why devalue what you do? Like, I said, I call myself a housewife because I have to do the same thing – home or not.
If housewife really means stay at home, not work on an outside job – then they have the wrong title for the show – those ladies own businesses – in and outside the home.
"I would say that we are all in agreement that a housewife is a married woman that is a helpmeet to her husband."
Okay, so how does housewife come out of this? Don't answer…we'll just have to agree to disagree on this one. LOL. The same is with the word 'kid', which is a baby goat. I correct ANYONE who calls my child… ahem…God's child a kid.
I admit, I'm a stickler for words and their true meanings.
Great post and excellent discussion.
@Heidi – How can you put one term on a woman that does so much? I love your description!
@B – I don't want to be thought of as cooking, doing laundry, and cleaning all day either. That's not all that I do. And you are right. There are a lot of women that would love to stay at home.
@Tabitha – You hit the nail on the head…we have to know our own worth, despite of what others may think.
@Party Favor Girl – Working moms work hard too!
@Momsweb – Words have power and I can understand why you feel the way that you do. I appreciate your honesty.
Wonderful post, Tonya!
If I can be real honest here… I honestly don't have a problem with the term. I find it interesting how we hate really being called something we actually are (those of us who stay home). There are other things we do besides being the keeper of the home. But as a stay-at-home-mom, our priorities are obviously to our house and children first. We are supposed to care enough to keep a safe, clean and healthy environment for our family. Unfortunately, society has caused us to believe that there is something wrong with that. In fact, they would probably tell us to get a maid or would rather us drop our kids off at daycare (no offense to those who send their children to daycare- just making a point). My point to all of this is simple. Whether you call yourself a housewife, home-keeper, or house-mother-diva, we all should do the same thing…and that's take pride in what the Lord has blessed us with the ability to do. When I watched a couple episodes of "The Real Housewives" I'd laugh because it seems like these women really have no clue. A real housewife works very hard- blood, sweat and tears, to keep her house in order…we aren't celebrity.
Sorry for the extra long post. My 2nd Novel will actually be about this! =)
Ooookay, NOW I understand and Kennisha helped me to figure out where my petty mental confusion is coming from (lol). Thanks Kennisha!
I don't consider myself a stay at home mom, so maybe that's the root of my issue. I'm a Mother – period. The whole label issue truly confuses me. If a father can be a father without labels, why can't a mother be…a mother? Somebody help me!
I've never felt 'proud' of what I do, but when I retired, I felt so humbled and honored. I consider Motherhood the HIGHEST calling and always believed society was the one sadly mistaken about our God-given role.
CMW, I'm sooo happy you started this discussion. I'll be emailing you for permission to use it in the next MW E-Newsletter. This is excellent round table discussion and I'm loving it. Can you tell? LOL. I'm finished now!
Proverbs 31 Women Wannabe!! LOL. Couldn't resist, aren't we all?!
Sorry just finally getting around to everyone I read daily. this week has been a little crazy! Housewife really doesn't upset me but I would rather be called a stay at home Mom than a Housewife. By the way, the blog looks great!
I don't mind the term housewife. Homemaker might be better, though. Society doesn't appreciate housewives, and you're absolutely correct: realty TV shows aren't very realistic. My husband, friends and family appreciate housewives so I have all the support I need.
I get looked at worse since I'm not a mom yet, a stay-at-home-wife. People assumed that I'm a kept woman pretty much. I've been thinking about writing about being a stay-at-home-wife, but I'm too emotional to deliver it like Jesus would, lol. I love your blog, btw, found you through Rachel Olsen's devotional posts.
I'm not so hot on that term, but perhaps that's because society isn't very supportive of it?
I usually describe myself as a homeschool teacher/writer. That takes up most of my days. I wish I had more time for the house stuff! The kids have to be taught though, and I have to try to bring in a little money…